Sunday, May 18, 2008

Ok, ok.







Bitten by Kelley Armstrong
A crime novel set in Canada! With Canadian werewolves! Love this book. It would be neat if they wore Sarah Jessica Parker's line of clothes, too.


Anyone interested in travel should read HolaIsabel's summary of her travel-fu skillz

I just invited John to go to Trader Joe's but I also want to go to Cory Doctorow's book reading in two hours. What to do?

Somehow, somewhere, someone in Miami is looking for faucet boobies...

magnify this user adsl-225-132-202.mia.bellsouth.net (Bellsouth.net Inc) [Label IP Address]

Florida, Miami, United States, 0 returning visit

Date Time WebPage
12th May 2008 11:10:46 my.att.net/s/s.dll?num=10&spage=search%2Fresultshome1.htm&channel=english&searchType=web&string=Faucet boobies&where=&sm.x=24&sm.y=15
shellynoir.blogspot.com/2006_10_01_archive.html

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Trying to update more than once a month....




Uglies by Scott Westerfeld

In Scott Westerfeld's distopian trilogy, Littlies live with their parents until the age of twelve. Herded into dormitories at the onset of adolescence, pre-plastic surgery "Uglies" go to school together, eat together, and play pranks until their long-awaited 16th birthday. Then they get surgery on both their bodies and their brains and become vapid and innocuous. Do only kids who go away to school get to have adventures? What percentage of literary hoodlums go to "away school"? Although, I must admit, homeschooling doesn't lend itself to action and adventure....

Monday, April 28, 2008

A prison? near my house? oh, goody....



Unquiet Dreams by Mark del Franco

I love this book, mostly because the descriptions of a half-imaginary Boston are so vivid. I've heard that Boston has an insane number of Colleges and Universities squashed into a small area but no sign of them ever shows up in this book. Mostly this is set in the poorest, saddest, most prostitute- and fae-ridden parts of town, which is mostly like my current living situation. This book left several loose ends which I hope will be addressed in the next. What happened to the little girl? She's in a safehouse somewhere, going to school I hope. What's with the thing in his head? Was it supposed to be there all the time? Oops, that was probably a spoiler there.

Q: What is with the extremely wide people that hang out in the aisle at the front of the bus? The ones who refuse to get off and wait outside so people can get off the bus in less than ten minutes?
The ones who insist we all brush past them on our way out the door? What's WITH them?

A: Unrealistic body image?




Runner by Carl Deuker
This YA novel is set in Seattle! It's moody and dark! It's jittery and it drinks too much coffee. I love it.

16 abandoned and decaying hotels from around the world

Mocoloco!

Pocket Pads
­As concerns about the environment grow, a few architects are betting that buyers will want radically smaller homes.




I played the Consumer Consequences game and found out that we need 1.4 earths for everyone to live my lifestyle.





The Braindead Megaphone by George Saunders
I love this book. What, you want more?

In Trouble Again by Redmond O'Hanlon
It's funny! It's gross! It's educational. Go buy it.


Funny quote of the day: "I had a drill sgt who used to say 'What if grasshoppers had machine guns, Privates? Then birds wouldn’t mess with them.' Then he made us do push ups."

Uninvited by Amanda Marron
Imagine everyone in your High School were as shallow and self-important as, say, Lindsey Lohan or Paris Hilton. Add a bunch of drugs, a lot of alcohol, and one vampire! Bake, and serve with beer or wine.



Monday, April 14, 2008

do be do be do


dang, no comments in the last five minutes...


Ignite Seattle!

and then their car was stolen by the Portland Mafia...



Silence is Violence, New Orleans, LA

John and I went to the Friends of the Library book sale today at 3pm. It closes at 4pm. I did this on purpose because BOOKS=CRACK. I was hoping there would be hardly any books left; instead there were around a million books, and I had no idea how much any of them cost. I was grabbing books here, grabbing books there. I didn't even have time to get to the books on tape section. I used to love books on tape. I grabbed all the books I could carry and went to the checkout line, thinking, "This will probably set me back $80 - $120. Not bad at all, considering." The lady rings up my purchase and chirps, "That will be eight dollars and twenty-five cents!" I hold out my credit card, gulp some air, dig around for a ten dollar bill, hyperventilate a little , and ask John if he can loan me $9. Next year we're going to give ourselves TWO HOURS to shop.


Get the skinny on population demographics for your zip code. ZipSkinny
(ThiswebsiteisnotendorsedbySkinnyCat. MemberFDIC. BatteriesNotIncluded. TrackSoldSeparately.)




My lipstick is moderately hazardous. Oh Noes!

http://www.cosmeticdatabase.com/
http://www.safecosmetics.org/










Today is Kiss a Braindead Mega-Bum Day
I just found this really cute book review website written by high school students:
Florida Teens Read in Brevard










4/10/2008: 64 bored and disappointed visitors! Go Me!









4/9/2008 Happy Birthday Tom Lehrer "The real issues I don't think most people touch. The Clinton jokes are all about Monica Lewinsky and all that stuff and not about the important things, like the fact that he wouldn't ban landmines... I'm not tempted to write a song about George W. Bush. I couldn't figure out what sort of song I would write. That's the problem: I don't want to satirise George Bush and his puppeteers, I want to vaporise them." Tom Lehrer, in 2003





















Text message from the past: Possums under deck are hissing at me!






















Details, details, details
Remember when you told me yesterday that Charles Bronson died? I'm thinking you meant Charleton Heston.



and then it started raining a whole lot, so I took a nap











Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Sidebars? We don't need no stinkin' sidebars

Here there be monsters:
75' South
101 Reasons to Stop Writing

Academentia
Allbleedingstops

Antarctica
If you like comic books, you'll love Apropos of Something
The Artist Formerly Known as Outside In
Aussie Lass

Awesome Places
Babette's Yoga Consortium
Banterist
Bartersauce
BeFrank
Beth
Blurbomat
Bonnie
BooksAuthorReadingsNearSeattle
BooksAuthorReadingskindofaroundSeattle

Books.CheriePie.com
BooksKinnicReads
BooksElliottBayBookCompanyEvents
Bookslut
Booktour
Bus Chick
Capitol Hill Seattle Blog
Chase me, ladies, I'm in the cavalry
Chickens
Craig Murray
Cross-Cultural Solutions
Days In A Life
DefectiveYeti
Delia
Dooce
Evidently
Extra Extra
Fark
French Toast Girl
French Word-A-Day
Fulcrum Monkey
Fussy
Gail Armstrong
Gomestic
GulfSails
Highland Farm
HolaIsabel

Hollow Squirrel
HHiPP
Improv Everywhere
indexed.blogspot.com
I Resign

InterConnection: A Place to Reuse, Recycle, and Learn About Computers
Jenorama
Ken Foster
Kenju
Keri - 500 Miles 2 Nowhere - Remembering those lost to cancer
Kimberly's Music and Cats
Linda Bindner Community
Mamacita
The Man Who Couldn't Blog
mark del franco
Metroblogging Seattle
MommaK
Monkey Disaster
National Geographic News
Oddwasted
O.G.R.E.S.
Overheard in the Office
Photoshop Phriday
Pruned

RareBirdFinds
TheRoad
theSarcasticJournalist
ScrapBlog

SeattleArchitectureFoundationWalkingTours
Seattle.metblogs
Seattle Notables
SmartB'sTrashyBooks
StacyHorn
Tatterdemalion eats poetry
Teacherwoman
TessaDare'sTMITuesdays
That Cute Red-haired Girl from Blogher
ToothpasteForDinner

Town Hall Seattle Calendar of Events
Wangari Maathai

War Historian Blog
whoissick.org/sickness
xkcd comic
Zookeepers


















Thursday, March 27, 2008

I wonder where the mommy bear is?


This morning I couldn't find SkinnyCat anywhere, Mickey came in and started gulping down his food but no Skinny. I grabbed the big bag of "duck and green pea" dry food that they love and ran around the front of the house squeaking "eep eep eep" and shaking the bag. No SkinnyCat. I hear a jingling behind me and Mickey is galloping right after me, apparently extremely anxious that his beloved bag of duckandsmashedgreenpea dry food is going away foreverrrrr!!!!
I run as fast as I can to the mailbox squeaking "eep eep eep" and Skinny dashes out from the neighbors' front porch. Hooray! I run as fast as I can to the front door and both cats are chasing me, racing me to the front door. We all squeeze into the house in one enthusiastic mass of fur and squashed duck dry food! I fill their bowl! I made it to work on time! Oh, happy day!
“All my life I’ve had one dream; to achieve my many goals.” - Homer Simpson









Text Messages From the Past:


Indianapolis drivers are crazy and I want to go home now




I'm visiting my family in Brooklyn.
The dog listens to me.
Everyone yelling all the time.
Very windy here.
M & C liked the "Go Me" onesie.
D-Train is a happy baby. Their cat likes me.
My cell phone is acting up.










Well, this artificial woman looks real, assuming "real" means "on happy pills and a bad case of pinkeye"

I'm so glad someone finally protested about Yellowstone...


Stuff to buy for those friends of yours who have kids now and who don't talk about fun stuff any more, they just, you know, talk about their kids, and then they talk about their kids' stuff... (Except for, you know, Karl)



HolliePhotollieBlollie

SeattleScape Blog









Text messages from the danger zone!

8:47 a.m. Guy got on the bus with a bloody head.

8:54 a.m. Bloody head guy got off at my stop - now I hv 2 wait 4 bus with bloody head guy

9:01 a.m. Woman passerby asks bloody head guy if he's ok - he smiles and says he's fine

9:05 a.m. Bloody head guy appears to be a student of some kind & does not appear to be inebriated

9:39 a.m. Bloody head Guy remained on bus after I got off - he is headed downtown. Be on the lookout. Description: Male, Pacific Islander, early to mid twenties; 5'10, slender build; ponytail, bloody head.









Midtownlunch.com earns $1000 a month...he works on it two hours a day...um....$25 an hour... I guess I can't puupuu that... can you?

Fun. Fun? Fun!

Sardis Raptor Rehabilitation Center Ferndale, Washington Distance: 100 miles

Thursday, March 13, 2008

What I don't understand is, why didn't he just pay cash?





Text messages from the past:

POODLE FIGHT!

It sounded bad, but apparently no poodles were seriously harmed.

Here's the scoop - big white poodle chained up in front of nail salon attacks smaller unrelated white poodle.

Little poodle and owner unhurt but quite flustered.

Big poodle still a dick.












Ten ingredients in the smoothie that I'm trying to choke down right now, without much success: Brown Barley, Black Barley, Sweet Rice, Black Beans, Apple, Chestnuts, Walnuts, Carrots, Potatoes, Cabbage, Burdock, Spinach. I can't drink any more of this.






Some sort of weird mushroom thing I found in the yard:













The subprime mortgage meltdown, explained using stick figures and foul language: Yay!







Those library people sure do get surly when you lose their books. . .












Text messages from the past:
11/28/2007 4:30 p.m. "Got you half-burrito. Skinnycat/General Bonkers is grumbling because Mickey is outside and she can't go outside yet."
4:57 p.m. "Mickey attacked on re-entry."
5:04 p.m. "Shared can of gloppy food defuses tense situation."
6:30 p.m. "G-bonk is sleeping noisily. Why does she snore so much?"




No one else seems to hate Bear Stearns as much as I do...Am I weird?













Trying to teach myself photoshop...










Click on the photo and read about Terror Birds!




















Most places I've worked have been scent-free. Maybe it's just a Seattle thing...





Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Anton Chekhov said, "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out."

Text message from the past:
"Neighbor Guy was using W&ders till 3"
"I hope Mickey craps all over his patio tonight"



TMFTP:

"4 want of a &?!# car light sensor all hell broke loose!!!"



Normally I don't put stuff like this here but it seems to be a good cause:

"The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on 'feed an animal in need' for free. It's in a purple box in the middle of the page. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising.

Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know."

http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/






Text message from the past: "I had the most ridiculous cheater ever today. He copied a paper on plagiarism and turned it in."






This Website lets me build my own LOLCats.
I'm so excited, because...welll, teaching myself photoshop was just NOT Happening.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Pollen all over my car this morning

The mind of a 6-year old is wonderful. First
grade...true story:

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story
of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the
part of the story where the first pig was trying to
accumulate the building materials for his home.

She read: "And so the pig went up to the man with the
wheelbarrow full of straw and said, 'Pardon me sir,
but may I have some of that straw to build my house?'"
The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do
you think that man said?"

One little boy raised his hand and said, "I think he
said...'Holy crap! A talking pig!'"

The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10
minutes.



Amazon.com reviews of: MILK!!!


A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders, but there are some good ones nonetheless. Their insight may surprise you.

Better to be safe than......................punch a 5th grader.
Strike while the ...........................bug is close.
It's always darkest before..................Daylight Savings Time.
Never underestimate the power of............termites.
You can lead a horse to water but...........how?
Don't bite the hand that....................looks dirty.
No news is..................................impossible.
A miss is as good as a......................Mr.
You can't teach an old dog new..............math.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll...........stink in the morning.
Love all, trust.............................me.
The pen is mightier than the................pigs.
An idle mind is.............................the best way to relax.
Where there's smoke there's.................pollution.
Happy the bride who.........................gets all the presents.
A penny saved is............................not much.
Two's company, three's......................the Musketeers.
Don't put off till tomorrow what............you put on to go to bed.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and..you have to blow your nose.
There are none so blind as..................Stevie Wonder.
Children should be seen and not.............spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed...............get new batteries.
You get out of something only what you......see in the picture on the box.












I love Overheard in New York. Have I told you how much I love Overheard in New York? Oh. Sorry.






The United Nations, Encapsulated
Dude #1: They have been underestimating my power.
Dude #2: What?
Dude #1: They have been underestimating my power for quite some time now.
Dude #2: What are you, a supervillain? Who's been underestimating your power? The justice league?
Dude #1: No, the electric company. They say I owe them eight hundred dollars.
Dude #2: Dude, you and I were having two totally different conversations.












Random email from the past: "I left you a very important text message this morning -- there are important new developments concerning 'the donut,' which should exonorate me of all wrongdoing. "